


The Cove

by QuixoticQuest (TheShortestManOnEarth)



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Comfort, Conversation that needed to happen between Astrid and Hiccup before their relationship developed, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Hurt, Mentions death of Hiccup's mother, Past Toxic Behavior, Post first movie, Pre-TV Show, Written before the release of the second film, in between moment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:20:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25762015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheShortestManOnEarth/pseuds/QuixoticQuest
Summary: Cross-Posted to my FFN under QuixoticQuest. Edited and reposted here.Astrid and Hiccup have a past together that isn't entirely perfect. Words cannot be taken back, but with an openness to being better and a candid conversation, maybe they can move forward with time.
Relationships: Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III & Astrid Hofferson
Kudos: 10





	The Cove

**Author's Note:**

> Hi All,
> 
> This is a much older fan fic I edited and I'm now reposting from my FFN account. The original idea (from when I posted it years ago after the first movie came out) came from from a conversation I had with my friends about Astrid and Hiccup's past relationship. Astrid wasn't nice to Hiccup and often acted with a lot of hostility towards him. I wrote this fic to address that behavior and add what I felt was a missing moment from the films and the TV show. 
> 
> This was written BEFORE the second film came out so at the time I first wrote this I didn't know that Hiccup's mother was alive. So keep that in mind as you read this. 
> 
> I'm slowly adding a few select pieces from my FFN account to my AO3, so keep in mind that some of these works are much older than the ones I'm currently working on and may not have the same polish (even though I am revising whatever I bring over). 
> 
> This story also is nostalgic. HTTYD was one of the first fandoms I wrote for back when I started writing fan fiction for the first time. That and Star Wars. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading this. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

One of the most confusing things about defying the norm was that the person who defied it would have to make up the new rules. Following rules was hard enough and formulating them so that they made sense was even harder. 

But making them up completely? That was impossible, or improbable at least. 

Hiccup had gone over many times in his mind how he had ended up sitting here on his favorite rock in the cove and was sitting with the last person he'd expected to want to even be in his presence in public, let alone private. Well, semi-private since Toothless was over near the tree on the far side of the tiny lake, one eye open and watching his rider with a hint of skepticism. Though that may have been Hiccup projecting more human qualities in the dragon than were there in reality and in some cases they really were there. 

Toothless had become an irreplaceable part of Hiccup's life over a matter of days. Now as he sat on the rock, staring out at the lake, he pondered what he had done to deserve such a loyal friend. Of course, Hiccup knew he had proven himself over and over to the dragon. He'd eaten a regurgitated fish head after all. 

Hiccup glanced down at his prosthetic. Somehow it never really occurred to him that proving his worth to his entire village would entail losing a limb. Then again, he _had_ tried to take down a massive dragon with nothing but his dry wit and spur of the moment ideas. 

It was purely reckless and dangerous. But wasn't that what his father had wanted him to be all along? Didn't his father want him to become bold and as a result, reckless? There were so many questions that had come up in Hiccup's mind when he woke up to suddenly find that everyone not only didn't mind his strange personality or brains over action point of view but they actually thought he was a hero of all things. 

Now that's where he stopped believing that this was reality. He couldn't have changed everyone's minds overnight. Or rather of the course of a few days, that just wasn't plausible. 

So that was what brought him to the cove to think on his own. For better or worse Astrid had somehow figured out where he'd gone that evening and sat down next to him, not saying anything despite the fact that she probably knew something was bothering him or at least that he had been thinking hard and long about what had happened in the past week or so. 

"I know you're probably thinking that I'm stupid for keeping everything to myself," Hiccup said finally. Astrid stared at him quizzically. 

"I don't think you're stupid," She said flatly, "I've never thought you were stupid." 

"Oh, no?" Hiccup said, feeling the bitter confusion rise in his voice. "Then why is it that you were always saying that I wasn't where I was meant to be or that I was a screw up?" He turned his head away, so he was looking straight at the lake. "You've always been like that, Astrid. I can't lie and say I haven't noticed the way you'd look at me as though I were a waste of space." 

Astrid sighed, "Do you want the truth?" Hiccup grunted. 

"If I said no, would you believe me?" He waved his hand to indicate that he didn't want her to answer. This was irritating. She was probably going to tell him a ridiculous lie to make him feel better. Something sappy and sweet to erase all the things she'd said and done to him over the years. 

He hadn't forgotten that she'd stood by and watched as Snotlout kicked the tar out of Hiccup for knocking over Snotlout's mug at the great hall. As Hiccup lay on the floor, bleeding from his lip and nursing his quickly bruising eye, Astrid looked down at him with a listless gaze. There he saw nothing but simple disappointment and overall a lack of care. What did she care that little Hiccup was on the ground, bleeding? He couldn't fight, he couldn't stand up for himself, and he wasn't calm and collected like Astrid. Fishlegs was known for his brains and he was big enough to make up for his lack of courage. Snotlout didn't have intellect on his side and neither did Tuffnut. But both boys were stronger and braver than Hiccup was. Ruffnut made up for any flaws with her stubborn attitude. She was picking more fights with her brother than the dragons, but at least she stood her ground. 

Hiccup didn't have any of those things. He was useless and he knew it. His father constantly reminded him of the fact and was especially brutal when they weren't in public. "Do you not understand, Hiccup?" Stoick had told his son one evening, "You are a burden to this tribe and to me. You have no strength; no skills and you certainly aren't big enough to join training. I don't know what to do with you anymore! I don't even know how you ended up as my son." 

Those words had stung Hiccup deeply and every time someone took a stab at him, he cared less and less. After all, he was used to the criticism, the resentment, and the overall shame he'd caused his tribe and father. He even had a hard time visiting his mother's grave because he didn't think he could face her. He was a burden to his tribe. 

So why, when he was ready to leave his village in peace had Astrid of all people shown up? It would have been easier if she hadn't so that they could have flown away from Berk that day. But Astrid, being her tough self, had pressed him for details with brutal force and without realizing it, Hiccup had unknowingly dragged her into his wild friendship with Toothless. At first, she hadn't accepted it, but she came around. 

That's where it got really confusing. He'd shown her what it was like to fly on a dragon and she'd accepted it. She'd even backed off from telling Hiccup's father about Toothless and the den. 

_Why?_

The question had plagued him after he'd gotten over the excitement of finally being accepted into Berk. 

"Depends," She replied, peering over at him. "What are you looking for?" 

He sighed, "I don't know." 

She frowned, "That's not an answer." 

"Why is this so important to you?" Hiccup demanded. 

That stopped her, "Why is what so important to me?" She stared at him, frowning slightly. Her eyes were filled with the light from the moon up above and the trees cast shadows on her face. It was hard to believe that she really did want to talk to him. This place was so isolated and cold, no one liked coming down here except for Toothless and Hiccup until now. He couldn't imagine why someone like Astrid would even consider wanting to sit on a rock and stare at a lake all day. 

"This," He gestured to the rock and then out at the lake and Toothless, "This place, the dragons and me," He almost muttered the last part. Astrid stared at him for a moment. 

"You asked me that before," She stated. 

"Yes," Hiccup said and looked down at his hands, "Now I want to know what your _real_ answer is." 

"That _was_ my real answer, Hiccup," He lifted his head to stare into her eyes. She looked a little angry from the way her eyes bore into him. But her smile said otherwise. "But if you like I can elaborate on that." 

Hiccup nodded, "Please." He wasn't sure if he should be apprehensive or angry at her himself for being so vague this entire time. She'd kissed him twice and he didn't even know why. He suspected it was because he suddenly embodied the qualities of a true Viking and had grown some… well, guts. 

"I didn't like you before," Astrid said, "I'm not proud of feeling that way, but I honestly didn't think anything of you. You weren't doing anything important and you were constantly messing up whatever everyone else was trying to accomplish. So naturally I just started to resent you for that." 

"Oh." Hiccup lowered his gaze to stare at his feet, or rather, foot. The metal from his prosthetic glowed and glinted to the point where he had to look away. The sudden warm weight on his hand turned his head to look at Astrid. 

"Nothing I did back then was right, Hiccup," Astrid said. For the first time since he'd really begun to get to know her, Astrid Hofferson looked guilty. He could see the shame on her face. "I hurt you and just watched others hurt you because I thought it was right. I thought that if you were hurt you would understand just how… useless you were." 

" _Am_ ," Hiccup stated, "Nothing's changed about me, Astrid. I'm still the same village idiot who stumbles around without a clue. I'm still too small to fight and I'm never going to be the leader my father was." 

"Maybe you don't have to be," Astrid said with a shrug. "You're the one who stood up to your father to prove that he was wrong about dragons. Who's to say he wasn't wrong about other things too?" 

"You don't understand," Hiccup said, holding up a hand to stall any comments from her, "My father is _never_ wrong." 

"He was wrong about you," Astrid stated evenly. Hiccup opened his mouth and then shut it again. Astrid was tough to fight no matter what battlefield it was on. It was beyond ridiculous that there wasn't a single fight she couldn't win. 

"How?" Hiccup asked, raising his eyebrow. He was starting to wonder if Astrid was delusional since she only seemed to have praise for him now. He wasn't buying it, not yet. 

She sighed, "Listen, Hiccup, and listen well because I'm only going to explain this to you once. Okay?" He nodded, still frowning dubiously. 

"I'm listening," He said. She took a deep breath. 

"Here's the honest to Thor truth: Your father didn't think you would amount to anything and I'm sure he let you know as much. He also didn't think you were worth anything to this village unless you were like everyone else. Something about how you thought about things made you dislikable and problematic to him. He didn't understand why you weren't, despite all your efforts, becoming strong and courageous and like-minded as the other trainees. I'm sure you noticed that too. 

"He didn't get you, Hiccup. No one did. Not Gobber, not the other trainees and definitely not me," She hadn't lifted her hand from his and Hiccup, in his state of confusion wasn't making any signs that he wanted to move just yet. Astrid took this to be a sign since she was already getting some agitated hints from him. Not that she could blame him for being angry and confused after all that had happened. 

When everyone had suddenly gone from hating his guts and wishing he didn't exist to celebrating his existence and loving him, it was no doubt more than a little bit sketchy. 

"So my taking you on that flight made you 'get it'?" Hiccup asked tentatively. Astrid shrugged. 

"That and what you told me at the cove that night," She said, "That you would risk everything just for Toothless. It finally occurred to me then that maybe you weren't being as selfish or ignorant as everyone thought you were." 

"Including you," Hiccup added, though not with hostility in his tone. It was a matter of fact statement. Astrid felt a pang in her chest at the hurt she saw in his eyes. 

"Yes," She said quietly. "Including me." A silence passed between them as a breeze shook the trees causing some leaves to fall. Toothless lifted his head to look up at the trees and then over at his rider. After deciding that there was no threat, he laid his head back down and began to snore blissfully. Hiccup smiled. He couldn't have asked for a better friend. 

"I know you don't believe me, Hiccup," Astrid said slowly, "But I meant what I said about you not being what I thought. You're not a screw up, you're not an idiot and you're more aware of the things around you than any of us are or will ever be." 

Hiccup turned his head to look her straight in the eyes, "But the only reason you think that is because I have Toothless." He winced as her fist hit his arm. 

"No, it's not," Astrid said with a grunt, "Stop putting words in my mouth." 

"Then get to the point," Hiccup said and abruptly stood up. He didn't want to hear anymore. Not only did he not hear what he thought would be a sensible explanation as to why she really changed her mind about him, but he got the feeling she was beating around the bush of the real answer. "Tell me, Astrid, if Toothless hadn't shown up, you would still think I was a waste of space, wouldn't you?" When she was silent, he repeated, "Wouldn't you?" 

She grimaced and then bit back, "Yes, okay? Yes!" Astrid glanced down at the ground. "Toothless helped me to see who you were sooner. But that doesn't make what I thought about you true." Hiccup laughed hollowly. 

"But it _is_ true, isn't it?" Hiccup asked. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "Look, I don't blame you for thinking those things. I just don't really believe that what happened could possibly change who I was and still am." 

Astrid turned so she could look straight at him, "Then don't," She continued to stare at him as she continued, "What happened doesn't change who you are, Hiccup. You're still the same person. But it also means that the way we see you now depends on how you see yourself, not the other way around," She paused, "How do you see yourself?" 

He blew a sigh, "Honestly? I have no idea." She smiled. For some reason that smile always got Hiccup to forget that he was mad about something or that there was something even wrong with his life. Right now, it was just strangely comforting because he hadn't been this mad in a long time. 

"You've got to have some idea," She said firmly. Hiccup shook his head. 

"My view of myself was that I was a screw-up and a failure. I don't think I could ever see myself any other way," Hiccup scuffed his boot on the ground and Astrid pushed herself up onto her feet and crossed over to him. 

"Your father doesn't think that anymore and neither should you," Astrid said. He averted his gaze and turned his head away. Two gentle hands on either cheek turned his head back around. "What's really bothering you?" He bit his lip. 

"I…" He swallowed, "I haven't been to my mom's grave… not since dad told me he didn't know how I was his son." Astrid's eyes widened and then narrowed in understanding. So, Hiccup really had embraced the Hiccup that the village saw instead of the other one that she now knew existed. She reached out and took his hand in hers. 

"Then let's go see her," Astrid said quietly, "She's proud of you, Hiccup. No matter what you do." He sniffed and wiped his now wet eyes on his sleeve. Astrid then walked with Hiccup through the forest until they came to a small clearing where a single gravestone sat in the ground. Hiccup stopped in his tracks and then began to backpedal. Astrid held fast to his hand and then put her free one on his shoulder. Hiccup put his foot forward and then without looking up started walking toward the stone. Once he was a few feet before it, Astrid let go of his hand and shoulder. His eyes lifted to take in the stone. It was the same as it had been those many years ago when his mother had first been buried. 

He couldn't really go down far because of his prosthetic, but he crouched down as far as he could so he could place his hand on top of the stone. "Hi, Mom. You wouldn't believe what's happened to me," He smiled through the pain he felt at thinking she would never be able to hear him. Part of him wanted to think she was out there somewhere listening, but he knew better than to think that. "I…" His words caught in his throat and he turned his head away. He didn't know what to say anymore. He felt something nudge him in the back and a warm hand touched his shoulder as Astrid crouched down next to him and Toothless poked his nose around Hiccup's side to sniff the stone. 

"Your son is a great person, Mrs. Haddock," Astrid said, "I know it's taken all of us a long time to see it, but we do," She slipped her fingers through Hiccup's and squeezed his hand, "We all do." Toothless purred and licked Hiccup's other hand. He then smiled, scratching the dragon under his head. "I'll take care of him, I promise." 

Hiccup looked at her strangely for an explanation, but she offered none. Apparently, there was something to what Astrid had said that he would never understand. Wasn't he supposed to help take care of her? Hiccup stood up and took a deep breath. They then began walking back toward the village, hands still intertwined. 

"Astrid?" 

"Yeah?" She stared at him for a second. He was unusually quiet for a moment before he spoke again. 

"Do you really care about me?" He felt silly asking it, but there was still a question of whether she cared about him in general or because of what he'd done. He had to know. 

"What do you think?" Astrid asked with the same dry tone Hiccup had often used himself. "I told your mom I'd take care of you, didn't I?" 

"Yes, but why?" Hiccup said. "You told me what you didn't like about me before, but that's not any different from what I am now. So, I'm asking what it is that makes you care." 

She stopped and turned to face him head on. "I care because I've spent my life not caring about you. I care because you won't do enough of that on your own and I care because I know that seeing you fall into the flames fighting the Green Death was one of the scariest moments of my life. And that's not because you found Toothless. It's because I saw who you were and that not caring wasn't an option anymore." 

Hiccup found that he had nothing more he could say in response nor anything he could argue with her about on this subject. The way she was staring at him with her stature so uncertain and her eyes ridden with fear, he knew that she wasn't lying. This was enough. He stepped over and wrapped his arms around her without really knowing why he was doing that. She left her hands at her sides for a moment in surprise at his sudden display of affection, but then brought her hands up onto his back and gripped at the fabric of his shirt. 

"Thank you," Hiccup said. "And I've always cared about you." He had doubted for a long time if Astrid had ever seen him at all, but he had always seen her. No matter what she was doing or saying, he admired her and cared what she thought. Until now he hadn't known that she had a caring side. Astrid had come off as abrasive and cold. But this, this was nice. 

The cove was suddenly the warmest place in Berk.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think.


End file.
